Disorder in the Court

These are from a book called "Disorder in the Court."

These are things people actually said in court, word for word,
taken down and now published by court reporters - who had the
torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually
taking place.

Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July fifteenth.

Q: What year?
A: Every year.
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Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he
woke up that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"

Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.
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Q: And where was the location of the accident?
A: Approximately milepost 499.

Q: And where is milepost 499?
A: Probably between milepost 498 and 500.
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Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep,
he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
__________________________________________________
Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
_________________________________________________
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.

Q: How many were boys?
A: None.

Q: Were there any girls?
________________________________________________
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.

Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
_________________________________________________
Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.

Q: Was this a male or a female?
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Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.

Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an
autopsy.

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a
pulse?
A: No.

Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.

Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.

Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you
began the autopsy?
A: No.

Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and
practicing law somewhere