Confession of an IJAW kid

Little Diepriye came into the kitchen where his mother was making > dinner.
His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time
to tell his mother what he wanted.

"Mom, I want a bike for my birthday." Little Priye was a bit of a troublemaker.
He had gotten into trouble at school and at home.
Priye's mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a bike for his birthday.
Little Priye, of course, thought he did.

Priye's mother wanted Priye to reflect on his behavior over the last year.
"Go to your room, Priye, and think about how you have behaved this year.

Then write a letter to God and tell him why you deserve a bike for your birthday.
"Little Priye stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to write God a letter.

Letter 1
Dear God,
I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my birthday.
I want a red one.
Your friend,
Priye

Priye knew that this wasn't true. He had not been a very good boy this year,
so he tore up the letter and started over.

Letter 2
Dear God,
This is your friend Priye. I have been a good boy this year and
I would like a red bike for my birthday.
Thank you.
Your friend Priye

Priye knew that this wasn't true either. So, he tore up the letter and started again.

Letter 3
Dear God,
I have been an "OK "boy this year. I still would really like a bike for my birthday.
Priye

Priye knew he could not send this letter to God either. So, Priye wrote a fourth letter.

Letter 4
God,
I know I haven't been a good boy this year. I am very sorry.
I will be a good boy if you just send me a bike for my birthday. Please!
Thank you,
Priye

Priye knew, even if it was true, this letter was not going to get him a bike.

Now, Priye was very upset. He went downstairs and told his mom that he
wanted to go to church. Priye's mother thought her plan had worked, as
Priye looked very sad.

"Just be home in time for dinner," Priye's mother told him.


Priye walked down the street to the church on the corner.
Little Priye went into the church and up to the altar.
He looked around to see if anyone was there.
Priye bent down and picked up a statue of the Mary.
He slipped the statue under his shirt and ran out of the church, down
the street, into the house, and up to his room. He shut the door to
his room and sat down with a piece of paper and a pen. Priye began to
write his letter to God.

Letter 5
God,
I'VE KIDNAPPED YOUR MAMA. IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN,
SEND THE BIKE!!!!!!!!!!

The hit man.

Diepriye